Is he STILL dead?!

I bet that's what a lot of Christians are saying about Jesus as well. Not that I'm comparing Michael Jackson to our Lord Saviour. I bet ol' Jesus could've done a much better moonwalk than Jackson. And on water, too.

So yes, he's dead, but I'm not getting caught up in the massive furore surrounding his death/disappearance. I wasn't around when he was revolutionising pop music and, let's face it, I never knew the man. So let's all move on with our lives; it's not as though his music is forever gone.

What if this is just a cover though, and he's been cryogenically frozen? In 60 years time we could see the miraculous return of Michael Jackson (and probably some radical Christians proporting the return of Jesus.) I bet it's all just a big publicity stunt. Only time will tell.

You know how pets are sometimes buried in their own cemeteries? Do celebrities get their own graveyards? Macabre memorials to the Marx brothers and Arthur Miller; it doesn't bear thinking about.

We're all signed off from school now, which means I'm trying to sign on! It's far more difficult than it looks, as I need a National Insurance number that I'm sure I've never been shown, and I have to go along to regular interviews until I get a job or start university, whichever comes first. I'm willing to bet university.

Still, the summer is looking beautiful isn't it? We're finally getting the heat, and I don't have to wear a jacket out! Watch out ladies, the muscles are coming out. And the legs. Dear God, the legs.....

The summer is good for other reasons too, gentlemen. Get out there and spread the lurrrrve!

Whilst I was writing something the other day, I wrote "remember". If any of you are familiar with the game "Uxbridge English Dictionary", I have a new meaning for "remember": to reattach one's limbs. Not the best ever but it struck me that "remember" should be the opposite to "dismember". Just a thought...